What It Means to Win: True Victory Through Character, Loyalty, and Results
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For as long as I can remember, I’ve been a sore loser. I abhor losing with everything in me, and I do everything I can to win in every area of life. Some people call it “over-competitive,” but really, I’m just allergic to losing. Losing burns me. My best friend beat me in three straight games of Madden years ago, and I boycotted the game for six years because of the bad taste that loss left in my spirit.
But this morning, while working on outreach for my upcoming book, a close friend asked me, “What does it mean to win?” At first, I had my standard answer: “to come out on top of a situation.” That’s how my mind has always been wired—toward coming out on top.
Yet here I am, hours later, staring at this blank screen, contemplating what it truly means to win. And it hit me—not all my “wins” have been victories.
I used to think “doing it my way” was winning. It cost me partnerships and business deals. I used to think “freedom to act and do as I please” was winning. It cost me great relationships. I used to think “life without structure or parameters” was winning. It cost me the most valuable treasure of all—time.
Winning isn’t just about what’s on the scoreboard. Sure, those might be wins on paper, but a win on paper doesn’t necessarily mean a win in life. With my new book, I want to help people become winners in all aspects of life by unleashing in them a Wintality (Winning + Mentality).
As I sit here and reflect, I’ve come to realize that there are three essential components to ensure a true victory—a real win—in life.
Don’t Compromise Character
I always know when I’m not living right. Back in my early entrepreneurial days, I took shortcuts thinking, “Eh, it won’t hurt anyone.” Sometimes, I treated people poorly because it made me feel better about myself at the moment. In hindsight, I was so lost that the only reason I tried to drag others down was that I didn’t know how to lift myself up.
That "crabs in a bucket" mentality never works. When it was all said and done, the only person I hurt was myself.
Sometimes I said “yes” to business opportunities for services I had no clue how to provide. Now, I don’t think it’s inherently wrong to bet on yourself, but I had a few situations where I couldn’t deliver. And that 5% of failures—those stung. They hurt my credibility and tarnished my word with some people. Those character losses? They’re the ones that hurt the worst of all.
Don’t Cross Your People
Everyone makes mistakes. I’m not talking about those unintentional mistakes where you’re genuinely trying your best but still fall short. I’m referring to moments when you consciously choose to put your desires above the well-being of others. Loyalty to an opportunity should never surpass loyalty to your team.
Thankfully, it’s not in my DNA to cross people I care about, but I’ve been crossed—maliciously. And I’ve witnessed others get betrayed—for money, for power, and for ego.
When you betray someone or step on their back to get to a new level, your new platform is only stable as long as those you stepped on allow it. But eventually, people stand up—and when they do, you fall…hard.
Achieve the Intended Result
You can win in the short-term by just achieving a result. But to be known as a winner in life, you must achieve your intended results while maintaining your integrity and remaining loyal to your team.
Isn’t that what life’s about? Lasting victory? What’s the point of winning if those who know you don’t respect you, and there’s no one left to celebrate with? A win for yourself at the expense of others isn’t a victory—it’s a setup for immense failure.
Pursue life victories. Become an ultimate champion.
If you want to take your team, event, or conference to the next level, book Baylor to speak. For more mindset motivation, check out his 10-minute-a-day podcast, Shark Theory. Purchase Baylor's self-development books here. Mindset Matters: Let’s make yours unstoppable.