How to Stop Lying to Yourself and Start Winning

We all lie. That’s not a statement meant to shock you—it’s a reality we need to confront. The biggest lies we tell aren’t to others; they’re to ourselves.

Every day, we diminish our capabilities, downplay our potential, and convince ourselves that we’re not qualified, not skilled enough, or not worthy of success. But here’s the truth: those are just words, and words only have power when we give them action.

Your Mind Is Listening—Be Careful What You Say

There’s a fascinating reality about how our brains work—our minds don’t have a sense of humor. They don’t differentiate between sarcasm, self-deprecating humor, or legitimate doubt. If you tell yourself, I can’t wake up early or I’m not good at sales, your brain says, Okay, that’s what we’re doing, and follows suit.

Here’s something even more powerful—your brain also doesn’t recognize the word can’t. When you say, I can’t start saving money or I can’t grow my business, your mind auto-corrects it to I choose not to.

Say that again to yourself:

• I choose not to save money.
• I choose not to wake up early.
• I choose not to put in the effort.

Sounds a little different now, doesn’t it?

When you reframe your excuses this way, you start to realize just how much control you’ve been giving up. You start to see how many times you’ve let self-imposed limitations dictate your life. The good news? Just as easily as you’ve convinced yourself of these limits, you can reprogram your mind in the opposite direction.

Play the Positive What If Game

Most of us are champions at playing the What If game—the problem is, we play it wrong.

• What if I fail?
• What if I don’t make enough money?
• What if I mess up the presentation?
• What if I embarrass myself?

We create mental horror films about everything that could go wrong, and then we live in fear of a future we’ve already decided will fail.

But what if you flipped it?

• What if I land the biggest deal of my life today?
• What if I finally hit my financial goals?
• What if my speech is exactly what the audience needs?
• What if I step into my potential and absolutely crush it?

Your mind is waiting for you to tell it what to do. It’s going to follow whatever script you give it—so why not make that script one that leads to success?

Believe It Before You Become It

Muhammad Ali once said, “I’m the greatest. I said that before I knew I was.”

He understood something that most people don’t: belief precedes reality.

We always wait for someone else to believe in us first—for a boss to recognize our potential, for a client to validate our work, for the world to acknowledge our greatness. But here’s the hard truth: no one is going to believe in you until youbelieve in you.

Confidence isn’t given; it’s built. It starts with small, intentional decisions—choosing to see yourself as capable, choosing to replace self-doubt with possibility, choosing to show up every day like the person you want to be, until one day you wake up and realize you are that person.

Make Your Lies a Reality

Lies only stay lies until they’re made true. The choice is yours:

• Keep telling yourself the same old excuses, and they’ll keep shaping your reality.
• Start telling yourself a new narrative—one of confidence, resilience, and success—and watch your reality shift in ways you never imagined.

Lie toward the positive. Make it a reality. And one day soon, you’ll realize the truth: you’ve been capable all along.